Yellow Rage

Lucky Charms vs. $600,000

Swaziland's only stadium torn apart for lucky charms
Mon Jun 8, 8:21 am ET

LOBAMBA, Swaziland (AFP) – The artificial turf at Swaziland's only football stadium has been ripped apart by players who planted magic charms known as "muti" under the field, officials said on Monday.

Traditional rituals meant to help teams win their games saw the 600,000-dollar turf ripped up over the last month so the muti could be planted underneath, with the damage especially bad by the goals and at centrefield.

Government sports officer Sipho Magagula said the government might consider banning the team suspected of most of the damage at Somhlolo National Stadium on the outskirts of the capital Mbabane.

"This turf is hardly a year old," Magagula told AFP. "Maybe we have to consider banning one big team because whenever that team would be playing at the stadium something strange would happen at the stadium."

Sports Minister Hlobsile Ndlovu has filed a formal criminal complaint over the damage, according to local media. Police say they are investigating.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20090608/od_afp/fblswzstadiumoffbeat/print

Pablo Neruda

Pablo Neruda(1904-1973), a wonderful poet from Chile, wrote a book called The Book of Questions in which he asked many strange and perplexing, often unanswerable questions. Read them, and then either respond with what you think of these questions or leave your own imponderable question:


Tell me, is the rose naked or is that her only dress?
Why do trees conceal the splendor of their roots?
Who hears the regrets of the thieving automobile?
Is there anything in the world sadder than a train standing in the rain?

Why don't the immense airplanes fly around with their children?
Which yellow bird fills its nest with lemons?
Why don't they train helicoptors to suck honey from the sunlight?
Where did the full moon leave its sack of flour tonight?

If I have died and don't know it of whom do I ask the time?

why are steps important?

WRITE A CAPTION FOR THIS PHOTO.

BY THE WAY, THE GUY IS 7 FEET 9 INCHES. YIKES!

Great Short Poetic Read Aloud Story

'Trouble in the Bubble'
One day a beautiful bubble lands on top of a hill.
All the people in the town see the bubble, and start singing and dancing around it. 'It's a bubble, it's a bubble it's a great big bubble, it's a bubble its a bubble......etc
Then the king sees the bubble, 'That's not a bubble, that's trouble.' He steps towards the bubble and sudenly he is trapped in the bubble. Oh no now there is trouble in the bubble.
The King said 'eeee get me out of this bubble,' but there was trouble in the bubble and you can't rule a kingdom from a bubble that's trouble trouble trouble no you can't rule a kingdom from a bubble that's trouble.......what to do?
'Get me the great Green Knight, he has slain armies with his sword that can cut through air... The Green knight comes riding riding riding up to the bubble takes a swipe at the bubble and now there is trouble as he becomes trapped in the bubble.
'Eeeeee get me out of this bubble shouts the king … you can't rule a kingdom from a bubble that's trouble.......what to do?
'Get me the great Red Knight, shouts the king. He has the sharpest lance of all and can charge across the battlefield at the speed of lightning. The great Red Knight gallops towards the bubble lance outstretched, but oh no now thre is more trouble in the bubble.
'EEEE get me out of this trouble shouts the King, but you can't rule a kingdom from a bubble, thats trouble etc.......
Finally the Kings calls for his champion of champions the Great Black Knight he causes havoc and terror wherever he goes. Charging through the crowd in his golden and black chariot, he swings his great golden ball and chain, but 'oh no now there is trouble'
'eeeeee get me out of this bubble you can't rule a kingdom from a bubble that's trouble.......what to do?
Just then a little girl is coming back into town with her Dad who she's been out with. She sees the bubble. 'Oh Daddy' look at that beautiful bubble.
'That's not a bubble, that's trouble'
'Oh no Daddy look again it's only a bubble, a great big beautiful bubble' The girl dances towards the bubble and the crowd hold their breath as she heads towards the trouble. The king dances up and down in the bubble 'get me out of this trouble'. you can't rule a kingdom from a bubble that's trouble.......what to do?
The girl steps forward, 'trouble, there's no trouble it's just a bubble' and she pokes the bubble with her finger gently and ......it pops.
'You see if you treat it like a bubble, then that's all it is.

and that's the story of the 'trouble in the bubble, that wasn't really trouble, because it was really just a bubble.

Ghislaine W. /22/06

NEW REC CENTER

Have you used it yet? What's your opinion? Have you been on the climbing wall? Is it lacking anything you had hoped it might have? Write a brief review of the new facility.

Fire and Ice, a Robert Frost Poem

What do you think of it? What does it mean? Which word or word combination is most powerful?

----------------------------
FIRE AND ICE

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favour fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

Office Hours for Individual Conference Week

OFFICE HOURS: (ON BLOG)
Tue: 9-10
Wed: 7:30-9:15 and 11-1:30
Thu: 9-10
Fri: 7:30-9:15 and 11-1:30

MWL Extra Credit

If you are done with 8 of the 10 MWL by 5/29 you will receive a 3% extra "bump" upwards on your final essay.

Citations Issues

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/557/01/

This is the place to solve all of your citation woes. Remember, this last paper requires four sources, and they must be cited correctly.

odd photo...what is it?

TEXTING PROBLEMS?

Do you think we need padded street lamp poles, or should we just all start wearing helmets all the time? Texting helmets, the next big ebay idea.

Final Essay Assignment

Has the modern world made humans more or less connected to each other?

For this essay, you will consider the impact of technological advances on human relations. Are you better off for being in constant contact with your circle of friends and family? How does it change who you are that you are almost never out of range? Are there negative implications to being so connected?

For this essay, you MUST CITE AT LEAST FOUR SOURCES. Here are two of the sources that you MAY use. We'll talk later about citation format.

For this essay, you should think about using proper pathos, ethos, and logos appeals.

This essay will be approximately four pages double-spaced and typed.

Remember, this is an argumentative essay. MAKE AN ARGUMENT!!!


SOURCE 1:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/08/01/AR2008080103718.html

SOURCE 2:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25934644/





SCHEDULE
Mon 5/25 Memorial Day—Campus Closed
Wed 5/27 Individual Conferences
Fri 5/29 Individual Conferences
Mon 6/1 Final Essay Revision—Bring an Edited and Revised Typed Rough Draft

Would you rather?

Would you rather eat fish or go fishing?
Would you rather hike or bike?
Would you rather swim or listen to music?

------------------------------------------

This is an odd one. Don't answer the questions. Instead, add your own "would you rather" question.

What is stronger, nature or humans?

What makes a prison a prison?

"Stone Walls do not a prison make nor iron bars a cage."

Richard Lovelace 1618-1657

BIRDS ARE THE CRUELEST ANIMAL

They attack each other, some eat their own young, and they don't have remorse like cats who play with their food. So birds are the most cruel and mean animal. Do you agree?

Turnitin.com Info

Turnitin.com
You must upload your synthesis to turnitin.com by Friday.
Go to turnitin.com

Class ID: 2675524
Pword: english

Calexico restaurant says griddle has likeness of the Virgin Mary

I urge respect in your responses to this post. My question is this:

Think like a sociologist. Don't think about whether or not this is an authentic apparition of the Virgin Mary. Thinking like a ethnographer, like someone who deeply examines the world, tell me what is the meaning of this? What might drive people in Calexico, near the border between Mexico and the U.S., to believe that divine intervention caused this image to appear?

-----------------


This is from the LA Times.
-----------------
By Tony Perry May 4, 2009
Reporting from Calexico, Calif. -- A Mexican restaurant in this border town is drawing the curious and the faithful to see what some believe is a likeness of the Virgin Mary that appeared miraculously on a griddle.A cook at Las Palmas restaurant was the first to see the image.
"She started to cry and didn't want to clean the griddle anymore," said Brenda Martinez, who manages the family-owned restaurant.The griddle has been taken off the stove and is now displayed in a room behind the kitchen that is quickly filling up with rosaries, flowers, votive candles and other offerings left by visitors from the Imperial Valley and from Mexicali across the border."I feel she is here with us. I can feel her presence," said Joe Acuna, who owns a landscaping firm.
"She looks real, very real," handyman Mike Breseno said in Spanish.The Rev. Edward Horning, associate pastor at St. Mary Catholic Church in nearby El Centro, examined the griddle Thursday. He would not say whether he thought the outline on the griddle looked like the Virgin Mary. But he said, "If God wants to do something like this, he can do it." To some visitors, the image looks like the Our Lady of Guadalupe artwork in a basilica in Mexico City, considered Mexico's most popular religious and cultural symbol. Mary is said to have appeared on a hill outside the city in 1531.Among the offerings brought to Las Palmas was a replica of a painting of Our Lady of Guadalupe. Visitors glance at the painting and then the image on the griddle -- and some see a similarity."She's here, I know it," landscaper Alfredo Luna said.Only the church hierarchy can confirm that the apparition is a true revelation.But that hasn't stopped people -- including several Mexican wrestlers in colorful costumes and masks -- from making the trek to the restaurant, which is known for its menudo and carne asada and is tucked in a corner of a popular swap meet at Hacienda Drive and Ollie Avenue. The restaurant -- and the room with the griddle -- is open Wednesday through Sunday.Alberto Lopez Pulido, director and professor of ethnic studies at the University of San Diego, said that claims of apparitions, particularly of Mary, are not uncommon among Latino and Mexican Catholics. The Catholic Church in Central and South America is Mary-centered, while the church in most of North America is more Christ-centered, Pulido said. Seeing images of Mary in public places or work spaces fulfills the need of Catholics for a personal relationship to their religion outside the church, he said."It establishes a sense of community, of personal connection and access," Pulido said in an interview. "It makes their religion real to them."Martinez said one of the cooks felt the image had materialized to give her strength after her brother's fatal heart attack a few days earlier."Mary is here for us," Martinez said. "She wants to show us her love and tell us to keep the faith."

How is our President doing so far?

In general, have you agreed or disagreed with his policy decisions?

Today's Presentation

How can you make this campus culture better? Can it be improved? Have you seen a community developing or only a series of fairly unrelated groups? Based on what you heard today from Lauren and Ali, what concerns do you have about the way the administration works with students here. Will you do anything about it or stand idly by?

Are you worried about the Swine Flu?

Are you changing any habits as a result of the spread of this disease?



By the way, the first thing they do with a swine like this one is take a small piece of meat to a vet to test it for infections of any sort...so this one was clean...well, it is a pig, so "clean" is relative, right?

VIRUS

What is a virus? Here's a diagram of the flu virus, but think about virus as a concept, as something that attacks, latches on, takes over. Think about viral videos, starting out small, then multiplying exponentially as people email friends and family with the news of something funny or shocking. When a computer virus hits, we go into action to protect our computers. When a flu virus hits, people stop interacting, start washing hands more, stop kissing hello if they are in Mexico City, or wear masks. In some cases, governments keep people from travelling if there is a medical threat. There are quarantines in place all over the world. Are viruses only bad? Could an idea infect your mind and begin spreading to your conscious thoughts and actions? I think so. Why do some ideas disappear? Why do others take off like a weed or virus? Think about some idea you have had, either from reading on your own or frombeing in a class or from life itself, and think about how that idea began to influence your ideas. Can you think of such a moment? Was it a mental virus that you caught? What happened?

What do you think about when you see this photo?

Friday's Class

Add some of these to your revision and editing list:


1. Common Problems
--level of revision and editing--there will be no mercy on the synthesis
--commas: three rules to consider
The outer skin of the nugget was crispy, flaky and seasoned with pepper.
As we exit the car the pungent aroma of french fries fills the air.
Of course my friend and I chose the hot.
In my opinion the Commons is a good place to relax.
After I finished my pizuki, my check for $11.53 hit the table.
They are currently remodeling the outside of the restaurant so it should not be hard to find.
We selected Anita's for several reasons but our priority was time.
I had never been to Wool Growers so this was a great opportunity to try a traditional Basque dinner.
--numbers: spell out numbers 0-9, and use figures for numbers over 10
AND THE NUMBER ONE COMMON PROBLEMS WAS
--run-ons
My date and I were greeted kindly by the hostess, she quickly asked, "Will it be the two of you tonight?"
It's not loud, the floor seems pretty clean.
Then comes the entree, my favorite plate is the Shrimp Alfredo.
On rare occassions does my family like to eat at buffets, however, if there is one place that gets their taste buds going, it's this restaurant.
My steak was good and juicy and my friend's bacon was nice and crispy, that's how he likes it.

2. Sedaris
--where does Sedaris play with language in this book?
Here are two examples:
"The woman spoke with a heavy western North Carolina accent which I used to discredit her authority."
Sedaris describes that he went "from speaking like an evil baby to speaking like a hillbilly. 'Is thems the thoughts of cows?' I'd ask the butcher, pointing to the calves' brains displayed in the front window."
--where does this book critique modern American society?

Would you want to live in a treehouse?

Here are three treehouses. Cool, huh? But would you want to live there?

Would you buy an Android?

Are there moral implications to owning a robot that is very humanlike? How could it change our world?


------------------below is from the LA Times----------
The female android robot EveR-3 from South Korea is checked at the Hannover Messe 2009 fair for industrial technology during opening day in Hanover, central Germany. More than 6,000 exhibitors from 61 countries will present their latest in high-tech know-how through Friday.
April 20, 2009
http://www.latimes.com/news/local/photography/la-0420-dayinphotos-pg,0,4930492.photogallery?index=10

Look!

What is on the mind of this sculpture?

SYNTHESIS ASSIGNMENT

SYNTHESIS
Your assignment is to write a synthesis essay consisting of three to four pages, double spaced, and synthesizing one of the following groups of sources. Your synthesis should argue something unique about the sources. Your synthesis should also be well-written and thoroughly revised.

The typed rough draft is due on Friday, May 1.

If you do not turn in a typed rough draft on the revision day, you will not pass this assignment.

The final draft is due Monday, May 4.


1. Artistic Expression

Source A:
“A Family,” 1996, by Fernando Botero

Source B:
“The Flower Carrier,” 1935, by Diego Rivera

Source C:
“Art is the stored honey of the human soul, gathered on wings of misery and travail.” Theodore Dreiser




2. World Issues(Roxana Saberi):

Source A:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/8007822.stm

Source B:
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/world/la-fg-iran-saberi19-2009apr19,0,6843493.story

Source C:
http://english.aljazeera.net/news/middleeast/2009/04/2009418214513576249.html



3. Border Violence


Source A:
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/world/la-fg-mexico-drugs-general18-2009apr18,0,917553.story

(U.S. and Mexico)

Source B:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,416202,00.html
(Pakistan and Afghanistan)

Source C:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6032409.stm
(Sudan and Chad)



4. Make Your Own…must be cleared by me!

Revising the Restaurant Review

Here are some tips for how to revise your restaurant review:

EDITING

Is the name of the restaurant capitalized?
Is it clear where the rest. is located?
Are there any texting mistakes, like u for you? Those are fatal!
Are there clearly definable paragraphs?
Is the writing sloppy at times?




REVISION

1. As you read the review, do you get a sense of being there? Do you smell the food, see the decor, or hear the sizzle of cooking or the clanking of dishes? How is the level of descriptive detail? Are there strong examples?

2. Does it feel like the author is a part of the review? Does the author speak of his or her own experience with the place or only of the food?

3. Does the review feel rushed or incomplete? Does it feel like the author simply got the assignment done or that the author actually thought through each piece of this assignment?

4. What would make this review better?

Being Plugged In

Are we better off as people because we have such constant access to so much information, or have we lost sight of what is important because of all of that? Are we better people because we can google the capital of Rwanda in 10 seconds? Or is our reliance on technology making us weak? Make an argument!

Best Sport

What is the best sport on the planet and why? Is it that swimming, skiing, curling, American football, intelligent football, Basketball, that one sport with a stick and ball where everyone stands around in the field? Make your case.

Do the Buildings Exhibit a Value System?

This is a great thought from one of your classmates. Is it possible that the buildings we construct say something about who we are and what we value? If so, what do they say?

Also, how are tangible things like buildings (or cars or phones...) related to intangible things like values (or love or hope...)?

--thanks to Sherri for this idea!

RESTAURANT REVIEW ASSIGNMENT

For this assignment you need to go research a restaurant (meaning, eat there and take notes) and write a review of your experience. Your review should be creative, specific, and enticing. You should use your writing to make your reader taste, see, and smell the food you ate. In other words, be descriptive. If possible, go with someone else so that you can experience (and even taste?) various dishes. However, try to avoid writing about restaurants that you think others in class might choose. If you choose a chain restaurant, be sure to tell your reader which one it is—i.e. not just “McDonalds” but “the McDonalds at the corner of Coffee and Hageman.” Also, if you choose to do a review of a chain, like Der Wienerschnitzel, you had better do something to make your review stand out.
You may follow one of the samples we examine in class, create your own rating system, or follow any creative instincts that allow you to effectively convey the information on this restaurant.

Your review must comment on the ambiance, the food, and the service.

Typed Rough Draft Due in Class: Friday 4/17

If you do not bring a typed rough draft to class on this day, you fail this assignment.


FINAL DRAFT DUE: Monday 4/20

Your review should be between 700 and 1000 words. (approximately 2 pages)

ROMAN AQUEDUCT IN SEGOVIA, SPAIN

This is a waterway that the Romans built almost 2000 years ago. It makes me think; what of our society will still be standing in 2000 years? Look around you...what will last and what will be gone?

Can you guess the title of this painting?

Is this beautiful? Is it hideous? Is this good art?

Can you guess what this is?

What images or words come to mind when you see this?

My Writing Lab

If you already know who to get onto this system, here's the code to add our class:

Brummett143529W

We'll go over this in more detail this week.
dr. s

What is happening in this photo?

Any ideas? Describe the scene. Where are they? What are they doing?

STATEMENT TO SIGN AFTER READING READING EVERYTHING BELOW

Hey Dr. Schmoll,
I have read and do understand the policies on this syllabus.


Signed _____________________ Date:

COURSE SYLLABUS

MY EMAIL: bschmoll@csub.edu
MY OFFICE PHONE: 661-654-6549

SYLLABUS

Dear Class,
Welcome to this course. This quarter, we will enjoy numerous experiences together, traveling on countless mental journeys. To start things off, I have constructed a syllabus that will guide the class, hopefully answer many of your questions, and become the official constitution and law of this course.
Why is this syllabus so long, you may ask? As a student, you realize what you must do to succeed in college, right? Some students, rather than doing what is necessary and accepting the consequences of their decisions, would rather abuse the system by searching for loopholes in each professor’s syllabus. One of the best professors to ever teach at this institution never even gave students a syllabus; how would he fare in our overly legalistic climate today? I’ll let you ponder that, but for now, it’s important to say that this ridiculously long syllabus represents my desire to state all rules and regulations and to clarify what this course is all about.

Attendance:
Just to be clear, to succeed on tests and papers you really should be in class. That’s just common sense, right? To pass this class, you may not miss more than two classes. Why is that? Does it sound harsh? Every class meeting matters. If you miss two classes that’s bad; how can you expect to do well doing that? Certainly your participation grade will suffer if you do that, but we’ll talk about that later. For now, if you miss that third class meeting, you are missing 10% of the quarter. You cannot do that and pass. So, here’s what we do. Do your darndest to not miss any class unnecessarily. Let’s say your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife calls and wants to take you to Tahiti this weekend, but you won’t be back until late Tuesday night. Here’s what you say: “Honey, I love you, but Dr. Schmoll seems to value my education more than you do, so we are breaking up.” Ok, that may be harsh, so don’t do that, but just make sure that you do not miss any class until the 8th week. What I’ve found is that it seems inevitable that those who miss two classes early for pathetic reasons like doctor’s appointments that should have been more carefully scheduled get to the 8th week and then have to miss for a legitimate reason (like a surprise meeting at work, a sick child to take care of, or a flat tire). If you get to that 8th week and then have to miss your third class, it’ll be bad. By that point, I’ll be kind, compassionate, a real shoulder to cry on, if you want, when telling you that you’ve now failed the course. Now, if you make it to the 8th or 9th week and you have not missed those two classes, then you have some wiggle room, so that if, heaven forbid, your cat Poopsie gets pneumonia and you have to sit up all night bottle-feeding her liquid antibiotics, you and I don’t have to have that ugly conversation where I tell you that Poopsie gets blamed for you failing the course. Let’s put this another way; do you like movies? No way, me too! When you go to the movies do you usually get up and walk around the theatre for 15% of the movie? Let’s say you do decide to do that, out of a love of popcorn and movie posters, perhaps. If you did that, would you expect to understand the whole story? Okay, maybe if you are watching Harold and Kumar, but for anything else, you’ll be lost. So, please, get to class.

Being Prompt:
Get to class on time. Why does that matter? First, it sends the wrong message to your principal grader(that’s me). As much as we in the humanities would like you to believe that these courses are objective (at what time of day did the Battle of the Marne begin?), that is not entirely the case. If you send your principal grader the message that you don’t mind missing the first few minutes and disturbing others in the class, don’t expect to be given the benefit of the doubt when the tests and papers roll around. Does that sound mean? It’s not meant to, but just remember, your actions send signals. Being late also means that someone who already has everything out and is ready and is involved in the discussion has to stop, move everything over, get out of the chair to let you by, pick up the pencil you drop, let you borrow paper, run to the bathroom because you spilled the coffee, and so on. It’s rude.
So, what are the consequences of persistent tardiness? What do you think they should be? Remember that 10% participation? You are eligible for that grade if you are on time. Get here on time. And no, I’m not the jackass who watches for you to be late that one time and stands at the door and points in your face. One time tardiness is not a problem precisely because it is not persistent. It’s an accident; maybe Poopsie turned off your alarm.

The Unforgivable Curse:
Speaking of one time issues, there is something that is so severe, so awful, that if it happens one time, just one time, no warning, no “oh hey I noticed this and if you could stop it that’d be super,” you will automatically lose all 10 percent of the Participation grade. Any guesses? Cmon, you must have some idea. No, it’s not your telephone ringing. If that happens, it’ll just be slightly funny and we’ll move on. It’s a mistake and not intentional, and the increased heart rate and extra sweat on your brow from you diving headfirst into an overstuffed book bag to find a buried phone that is now playing that new Cristina Aguilera ringtone is punishment enough for you. So, what is it, this unforgivable crime? Texting. If you take out your phone to send or receive messages you will automatically lose 10% of your course grade. That means, if you receive a final grade of 85%, it will drop to 75%. If you receive a final grade of 75%, it will become a 65%. Why is that? The phone ringing is an accident. We laugh at it; we move on. Heck, my phone my even go off during class. Texting is on purpose and is rude. It, in fact, is beyond rude. It wreaks of the worst of our current society. It bespeaks the absolutely vile desire we all have to never separate from our technological tether for even a moment. It sends your fellow classmates and your teacher the signal that you have better things to do. Checking your phone during class is like listening to a friend’s story and right in the middle turning away and talking to someone else. Plus, the way our brains work, you need to fully immerse yourself, to tune your brain into an optimal, flowing machine (see Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s incredible book Flow) that can grasp and can let itself go. Students now tend to see school as a stopover on their way to a career. Brothers and sisters, that’s deadly! I wish that I could pay for you all to quit your jobs and just focus on the mind. I can’t yet do that but if I could I would, because it’d be worth every penny. Devoting time to the mind and to thinking deeply about your world will change who you are and how you approach your future, your family, your job, and your everything. Is that overstated? I believe it to be true. So, until my stock choices really take off so that I can pay all of your bills, promise me one thing. When you are in class or preparing for class, you have to be fully here. Oh crap, now it’s going to sound like a hippy professor from the 1960s: “I mean, like, be here man, just be here.” Maybe the hippies had something. Devote yourself fully to your classes by unplugging from the outside world for awhile.

Late Policy
I do not accept late papers...it's that clear. If, by some means, a tornado hits your car forcing you to turn in a paper a day late, the paper will lose 10% for each day that it is late. Be responsible.

Class Climate:
No, I don’t mean whether it’s going to rain in here or not. Sometimes I’ll lecture at you, but even then, your participation is vital. How can you participate when someone is lecturing? Any ideas? Turn to a neighbor and tell them the story of your first day at school in kindergarten. Now, if you are the one listening to the story, right in the middle look away, look at your watch, sneer at them, roll your eyes, yawn, wave to someone across the room, nudge a person next to you and tell them a joke, all while the other person is telling about his or her first day of kindergarten. If this happens in social setting we call it rude, and we call the people who listen in that way jackasses. They are not our friends precisely because we deeply value listening and do not put up with those who do not listen well. Right? So, there will be lecturing, and if you abhor what we are doing, then fake it. I used to do that sometimes too: “oh no, professor, I love hearing you talk about President Reagan’s supply side economics.” If we listen to psychologists, by faking interest you’ll be learning much more than if you show your disinterest. The next time you are sad force yourself to smile and you’ll see what I mean. So, sometimes there will be lecture. At other times there will be discussion of short readings that we do in class. During these times, it’s crucial that you do the silly little exercises: turn to a neighbor; find someone you don’t know and discuss this or that; explain to your friend what we just went over in lecture; pick something from the reading to disagree with; find two people on the other side of the room; throw cash at your professor…ok, maybe not that last one. This class is a bit unique in that it violates the normally accepted activity systems of college history classrooms. What we do in discussion will help solidify the concepts of each section of this course in your brain. If you are active in class, you will have to study less, and you’ll find yourself remembering much more.

Mining:
Have you ever wanted to be a miner? They do have those cool helmets with the lamp on top. Think about what miners do. They dig and dig, into the earth, looking for gold, coal, silver, or other valuable rocks. Sometimes all their digging amounts to nothing. They have to stop, change directions, and dig again. But sometimes they hit a productive vein. Our class will be a little like that. We’ll do some exercises that will amount to nothing and go nowhere. Who is the best judge of that? That’s right; you are! Sometimes we’ll do a written piece that will be fabulous and will produce beautiful golden prose. You will want to polish those pieces with your writing group and turn them into even more brilliant and shining jewels.

Reading:
How many of you love reading? I did not read a book until I was 18, so if you have not yet started your journey on this ever widening path, it’s never too late. In any course, there’s no substitute for reading. Jim Moffett says that “all real writing happens from plentitude,” meaning that you can only really write well about someone once you know about it. Reading is one way to know—not the only, by any means! I want you to have experiences with great texts. I can show you voluminous research proving why you nee to read more, but then if I assign a stupid, long, expensive textbook you probably will end up not reading, or only reading to have the reading done, something we have all done, right? The economy now requires much high literacy rates (see The World is Flat), and even though reading levels have not gone down in the last 40 years, it is crucial that you start to push your own reading so that your own literacy level goes up. For these ten weeks, diving wholeheartedly into the course reading is vital. Remember to read in a particular way. As reading expert and UCSB professor Sheridan Blau has argued, “reading is as much a process of text production as writing is.” Reading involves revision? Does that sound silly? As you read, think about the different ways that you understand what you read. Most importantly, when you read, think about the words of E.D. Hirsch, who says that we look at what a text says (reading), what it means (interpretation), and why it matters (criticism). Hey, but if you are in a history course, aren’t you supposed to be reading for exactly the number of miles of trenches that were dug in World War One, how many railroad workers died from 1890 to 1917, or what the causes of the Great Depression were? Anyway, the answer is yes and no. There are two types of reading that you’ll do in college. As the literary goddess theorist Louise Rosenblatt explains, there is aesthetic reading, where you are reading to have an experience with the text, and there is efferent reading, where you are reading to take away information from the text. You do both types all the time. Think about a phone book. You have probably never heard someone say of a phone book, “don’t tell me about it, I want to read it for myself.” Reading a phone book is purely efferent. In this course you will practice both types of reading. I have chosen texts that you can enjoy (aesthetic) and that you can learn from(efferent). I want to see and appreciate the detail in our reading, but in this course I’ll give you that detail in class lectures. In the reading, it’s much more important that you read texts that will live with you forever and to inspire you to think more thoroughly about your world. As you read, you should be working hard to create meaning for yourself. As Rosenblatt asserts, “taking someone else’s interpretation as your own is like having someone else eat your dinner for you.” Please, don’t let the numbskulls as wikipedia or sparknotes eat your dinner for you.





Class Rules:
1. Your teacher is always right;
2. Rule number one is sometimes wrong;
3. Since number two is more accurate than number one, you can always disagree with your teacher on intellectual class matters. If, for instance, I am telling you that the war in Iraq will produce vast economic success and you disagree, by all means, disagree. The worst thing you could possibly do would be to sit with your disagreement and then let it turn bitter. You are in college to learn to think critically and a major component of that is doubting and questioning your professors and engaging your classmates in deep debate;
4. You should not lie to your teacher. How stupid that I should have to say that here, right? But I am sick and tired of hearing that a student is not in class because of that wonderful new word to which teachers can have no response: “famamergency.” (translation: “family emergency”) Just tell the truth and the world will be a better place;
5. You will speak every day in this course. No, I will not call on you or ask you to sing in front of class, but you will quite often hear me say, “turn to a neighbor and…”;
6. Be respectful of your classmates;
7. You should use and abuse office hours. I’m in my office a ridiculous number of hours per week. One of the nest ways for you to retain information and build the kind of intellectually active life that makes college wonderful is by connecting with your teachers in office hours. Your learning will increase immeasurably.



GRADED BUSINESS
My Writing Lab: (10%)
This is a computer-based program that will help you tackle your writing problems with exercises. While the best way to learn to write better is to write and read more, this program will give you specific assistance in your areas of greatest need.

Blog Entries (10%)
Each week you will submit entries and responses to our class blog. These entries, thoughts, complaints, ideas, movie or book suggestions, restaurant recommendations, or whatever you write, will extend the discussions of our class to the wider, internet world.
The blog name for this class is http://schmollenglish100.blogspot.com/
Sometimes, you may just want to read and ask questions of your classmates. Sometimes, I’ll ask you to post something we write in class up on the blog. This is an experiment, so we’ll see how it goes.

Profile (10%)
You will interview a classmate. This interview will be turned into a profile, a written and read piece that you will use to introduce the person you interview. In your interview you should be probing for information

Participation: (10%)
See the text above.

Restaurant Review: (10%)
Do you love to eat as much as I love to eat? Good. Go to a restaurant and take notes on the ambiance, the service, and the food. Write a review and post it to the website Bakersfield.com.

First Assignment: (10%)
Multi-Genre Writing: For this assignment you must complete a writing topic in five different genres. The theme of your multi-genre assignment will be up to you, but I would strongly suggest using some of the writing that you have already completed this quarter. Use something that you or your writing group valued.

In-Class Essays: (10%)
We will write two essays in class. You will choose which one you want to have graded and recorded.
To be eligible to pass this course you must earn a C- or higher on one in-class essay.

Final Assignment: (20%)
Connectivity: Has the modern world made humans more or less connected to each other?

GRADE BREAKDOWN:
Participation: 10%
Restaurant Review: 15%
First Assignment: 10%
Final Assignment: 25%
In-Class Essays: 10%
Blog Discussions: 10%
Profile: 10%
My Writing Lab: 10%

COURSE SCHEDULE

Fall 2008 English 100

Wed 4/1
§ Go over syllabus; assign reading; assign homework

Fri 4/3
Signed Syllabus Statement Due/Dedicated Journal Due
Make a List of what makes good writing
Profile Interviews
Explain Reading Groups: you will meet with this group all quarter long.
Before you read any piece to the group, you should tell the group what you want as feedback: just listen, look at word choice, does it flow?, is it funny?, is it worth pursuing and polishing? Is it too long? Is it too short?
Also, no excuses from the reader: “this is no good.”
The rule is simple; just read the crap!
After you read the piece, someone in the group will say “thank you.” It seems odd, right? It’s a nice way to break the ice, and it really is nice to thank the author for having been so bold as to read something.

Mon 4/6
Stories and Meaning Exercise:
“McDonalds and ‘Honey’” Story Told Two Ways

When you start dating someone you tell them stories about yourself. Think of some of those and give them titles. Now tell one of those stories. Two other people will tell what it means.
What’s the point? Look again at your list of what makes good writing?
Meeting with Writing Group

Wed 4/8
§ Meet with Writing Groups to Work on Profiles:
Typed Draft of Profile Due in Class (READ IT AGAIN! Be responsible, typed draft due!!!)

Focusing Exercise (Start in the Middle)

Fri 4/10
§ Profiles Due (and to be read)
§ Working with They Say/I Say
§ Assign Restaurant Review:
Restaurant Review Chapter of Me Talk Pretty Due

Mon 4/13
Book of your Choice Due:
Be ready to write the greatest book report ever created!

Wed 4/15
§ Dan Kirby Exercise: _____ at your age.
_____ at half your age.
_____ at twice your age.
Observe the person from the outside.
For each time period, take a picture of yourself in words.
For each time period, start with a place: for example, “I am sitting
on the hood of my 1981, dog poo brown Dodge Omni, waiting for my bobbed blond haired 5 foot nothin’ tall girlfriend Beth Anne to finish working at the Wherehouse Music store on Columbus Street…”

Fri 4/17
§ Typed Complete Rough Draft of Restaurant Review Due

Mon 4/20
§ Restaurant Review Due
§ Assign Synthesis
§ George Hillocks Exercise on Analyzing Evidence: Slip or Trip?

Wed 4/22
§ Poetry is Cool:
§ Barry Spacks: “let’s get some poetry in the air.”
Yates: “every poem sings a little tune.”
Everyone is a Poet Exercise:
Think about the last time you were enraged, absolutely
incensed, full of anger. Why were you so mad? With whom were you mad?
Now, on paper write a description of the feeling, the
setting, the reason for your anger, and how the whole thing was resolved, if it was resolved.
Finally, circle key lines, words, or phrases in that piece.
Write the circled lines in a row, in any order.

Fri 4/24
§ Tortilla Curtain Due
§ IDIOMS EXERCISE (linguistic collocations): Hit the Road, Air your dirty laundry in public, all hell broke loose, alive and kicking, backseat driver, keep in mind, par for the course, hit the road, got up on the wrong side of the bed, as sharp as a tack, piece of cake. kick the bucket…what do these mean? Draw them as literal statements.

Mon 4/27
§ Crickets: http://audiopoetry.wordpress.com/category/poet/aram-saroyan/
or try http://www.mtraks.com/artist/aram_saroyan/track/498707-crickets_1965/
by Aaron Saroyan (Is this poetry?)
§ Haiku: 5-7-5
Fall in Bakersfield
Leaves change but heat will not cease
Burn, infernally, summer

Wed 4/29
§ Typed Rough Draft of Synthesis Due
§ Crime Story (Porphyria’s Lover) R.J. Blick, Mrs. R.J. Blick, Porphyria
Blick, Hubert Fenston, R. Emerson Chandler
What kinds of writing would this crime produce?

Fri 5/1
§ Synthesis Paper Due
§ Neighborhood Map
§ Creation Stories:
Blood Clot Boy
Write your own creation story, giving personality to animals or other natural forces. Explain some aspect of nature.

Mon 5/4
§ Meet with Writing Groups

Wed 5/6
§ Ellis Island Photo Writing (with photos from Ellis Island, write a first
person narrative)
§ Compare and contrast the following two videos:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lk1awSIang (outkast)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0FuMRHRCVY (hayseed)

Fri 5/8
§ Write Around with Quotes
§ Start Multi-Genre Piece
Look back at the “Everyone is a Poet Anger Exercise” as a Sample.
For this assignment you must complete a writing topic in five different genres.
Let’s start by making a list of genres: college essay, apology,
bedtime story, movie script, description….
Next, decide on a written topic, either something you’ve already
started or something new you would like to write about.
Now, brainstorm a list of genres that seem to fit this topic. Think
broadly here. For instance, even if your topic is Sen. Obama you can still write a speech, recipe, bedtime story, or telenovela (soap opera).

Mon 5/11
§ Me Talk Pretty Reading Due
§ Random Autobiography

Wed 5/13
§ Recall your favorite place to play as a child. Write about something that happened there. What was so great about the place?
§ Take three stories from around the room and answer the following questions: who do these stories have in common? taken together, what does it mean to play? Answer them in your group.

Fri 5/15
§ Making each other authorities assignment: interview a neighbor and incorporate their feedback into your own writing.
§ Start Final Assignment: Has the modern world made humans more or less connected to each other?
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/08/01/AR2008080103718.html

Mon 5/18
§ Writing about Art:
Is this beautiful? http://wallpaper.travelblog.org/Wallpaper/pix/tb_fiji_sunset_wallpaper.jpg
Is this beautiful? http://www.artinthepicture.com/artists/Gustav_Klimt/kiss.jpeg
Is this beautiful? http://img207.imageshack.us/img207/5448/198420afghan20girlhz1.jpg
Now, define beauty without using examples.
Is it possible? What does it mean to be beautiful?

Wed 5/20
§ Writing and Music

Fri 5/22
§ Writing and Music

Mon 5/25 Memorial Day—Campus Closed
Wed 5/27 Individual Conferences
Fri 5/29 Individual Conferences

Mon 6/1 Final Essay Revision—Bring an Edited and Revised Typed Rough Draft
Wed 6/3 Final Essay Revision—Bring an Edited and Revised Typed Rough Draft
Fri 6/5 Final Essay Revision—Bring an Edited and Revised Typed Rough Draft

Mon 6/8 Last Day of Class: Final Essay Due



REMEMBER, although this syllabus is the “law” of the class, I reserve the right to change it at any time to suit the particular needs of our class. If I must do so, it will always be in your best interest, and I’ll always advise you as soon as possible.

Composition Standards and Policies

California State University, Bakersfield
Composition Standards

English 100: Critical Thinking and Writing

Prerequisite: Total English Placement Test score between 142 and 154 OR a grade of C- or higher in English 80 or 90.

To advance to English 110, students must earn a grade of C- or higher in English 100.

To be eligible for a C- in English 100, students must earn a C- or higher on at least one in-class writing assignment and a C- average on all other course assignments.

Course Description: Study of rhetorical patterns as critical thinking strategies to help students develop effective college-level writing skills. Frequent short papers in a variety of essay modes are assigned, and the fundamentals of grammar, usage, and spelling are reviewed as necessary. Tutoring is required with this course.

Course Goals
At the end of ten weeks, students in English 100 should be able to do the following:
1. read and write literally, interpretively, and analytically or critically;
2. recognize the differences among thesis statements, topic sentences/main ideas, and supporting details/evidence;
3. understand how the thesis statement, topic sentences, and supporting details work together;
4. recognize a writer’s tone and how it informs a text’s statements; this includes analyzing diction and syntax;
5. begin to recognize how a writer’s choices affect and inform the text;
6. summarize the main and supporting points contained in an article or essay on a particular topic;
7. write essays that are logically organized, well developed, coherent, and mechanically sound;
8. recognize bias in readings;
9. synthesize ideas from various sources;
10. incorporate quotation, summary, and paraphrase, using in-text documentation;
11. use a handbook;
12. recognize plagiarism;
13. revise and edit their own writing using standard, edited American English.

Reading and Writing Requirements
Assignments will move from reading to writing and may be distributed among the following:
● Silent Sustained Reading (SSR) fifteen minutes per class meeting
● reading strategies (i.e. think aloud, chunking, annotating, highlighting, key words, T
charts, and “Say, Mean, Matter”)
● three one-paragraph summaries or readings
● three to five essays (2 to 3 pages in length), at least two of which will be written in
class
● one documented synthesis (3 to 4 pages in length), which may be informative or argumentative


Writing Workshop
You are responsible for completing 10 MyWritingLab topics in conjunction with your English 100 class. This requirement is worth 10% of your overall English 100 grade. To receive full credit, you must earn a score of 80% or higher on both the Recall and Apply sections for at least one MyWritingLab topic per week, for a total of 10 topics. Since this is an online workshop, you can work on these topics outside of class, so long as you master at least one topic per week. This means that you should not wait until the end of the quarter to complete all ten topics.

To use MyWritingLab, you need to register to the site and create a user profile using your access code packaged with your Quick Access and the following course identification number:

Course ID#--####

For more help registering to the site and creating your user profile, view the power point at the following Web site:

http://www.csub.edu/mwl/eng100mwl.html

Note: To avoid double enrollment in MyWritingLab, students should not be enrolled in Humanities 277.1 while also enrolled in English 100. If you are enrolled in Humanities 277.1, please let your instructor know immediately.



Note: In order to be guaranteed a spot in English 110, you will need to clear all registration holds, including your mandatory freshman health hold. To do this, you need to go to the campus Health Center and follow their directions about your particular hold. If these holds are not cleared, you will not be registered into English 110.



Note: Please be aware that you are responsible for registering for your other classes.

Welcome to English 100

This is our blog site. You will access this site every week, responding to the thought-provoking posts that I offer. You will also receive course support on this site such as outlines, essay topics, or other course information.